You have to have seen the Rozarem commercial on the telly to get the title.
Neither Lunesta nor Rozarem work worth a plug nickle for me. How freaking sweet. They worked for two or three nights then worked no more. No eerie flourescent green butterfly thingy, no chess with random characters from my life. Thanks alot, "modern medicine"!!
Speaking of plug nickle, last Thursday the kids and I were at Rib Mountain by the Queen's Chair and there was a sign there about "Ancient Ripples". I read it aloud as "Ancient Nipples", which drew laughter from those climbing the Chair, and rebuke from my progeny. Of course we all laughed when I suggested "Ancient Nipples" as a Jeopardy answer, the question to which would be "What is under my grandma's polyester blouse?". Remember, I am child-like, not childish...
Monday, September 18, 2006
Driving Mister Teken
Grrrr!
You know, I'd like to say something like this:
"There's something very serene and peaceful and life-affirming about driving the streets at 2:30 in the morning. People all snug in there little beds and me rolling silently through the neighborhoods -- almost as a guardian, watching over them."
Yup, I'd like to say something like that. In fact, it would be true -- IF IT WERE OPPOSITE DAY!!!
Teken got into a major funk last night. The bulging file cabinet (see last post) broke open, and all those nasty files flew into the air and kept landing, hither-tither, giving me psychological paper cuts. So, I got up and drove for an hour. You know, I don't get great gas mileage when I have the weight of the world in the passenger seat.
I'm over it. The files are back, for the most part, in the cabinet. I slept from about 4am til about 11am and am drinking loads of coffee as I write. Must... refill... cup...
Ahhhh, much better. Teken coffee is STRONNNNG!!
Did you know that the cable and parcel delivery guys have a random number generator to determine when they will arrive at your house? That's why they say "some time between 11 and 4". They then enter your name into their generator and get an arbitrary time. You'll notice it's never at one end of the span or reliably in the middle.
In fact, this random number generator is CIA-funded, and also takes into account your bowel and bathing habits so as to catch you when you're pooping or drenched. You just can't hurry those things up, can you?!
But why? I'll tell you why: Because you know how we all play computer games and surf the web at work? Well, the geeks at the CIA, Homeland (in)Security, and WalMart (no, strangly, not Haliburton) watch you instead. And they just love watching you wipe furiously, or towel off incompletely, run down the stairs, and miss the dude by nanoseconds. It gives them gut-laughs.
Okay, no, that's not really why. It's because once in a while the bastards need extra time to arrange all the traffic lights to go yellow when you're approaching... No that's not it...
Once again, it's "Reader Participation Time". Explain in a comment to this post why you have to wait in your home from 11-4 every time you get cable or a parcel. I'll post the best ones. Oh, hell, who am I kidding, I'll post all of them that aren't gonna get me sued.
Happy commenting!
You know, I'd like to say something like this:
"There's something very serene and peaceful and life-affirming about driving the streets at 2:30 in the morning. People all snug in there little beds and me rolling silently through the neighborhoods -- almost as a guardian, watching over them."
Yup, I'd like to say something like that. In fact, it would be true -- IF IT WERE OPPOSITE DAY!!!
Teken got into a major funk last night. The bulging file cabinet (see last post) broke open, and all those nasty files flew into the air and kept landing, hither-tither, giving me psychological paper cuts. So, I got up and drove for an hour. You know, I don't get great gas mileage when I have the weight of the world in the passenger seat.
I'm over it. The files are back, for the most part, in the cabinet. I slept from about 4am til about 11am and am drinking loads of coffee as I write. Must... refill... cup...
Ahhhh, much better. Teken coffee is STRONNNNG!!
Did you know that the cable and parcel delivery guys have a random number generator to determine when they will arrive at your house? That's why they say "some time between 11 and 4". They then enter your name into their generator and get an arbitrary time. You'll notice it's never at one end of the span or reliably in the middle.
In fact, this random number generator is CIA-funded, and also takes into account your bowel and bathing habits so as to catch you when you're pooping or drenched. You just can't hurry those things up, can you?!
But why? I'll tell you why: Because you know how we all play computer games and surf the web at work? Well, the geeks at the CIA, Homeland (in)Security, and WalMart (no, strangly, not Haliburton) watch you instead. And they just love watching you wipe furiously, or towel off incompletely, run down the stairs, and miss the dude by nanoseconds. It gives them gut-laughs.
Okay, no, that's not really why. It's because once in a while the bastards need extra time to arrange all the traffic lights to go yellow when you're approaching... No that's not it...
Once again, it's "Reader Participation Time". Explain in a comment to this post why you have to wait in your home from 11-4 every time you get cable or a parcel. I'll post the best ones. Oh, hell, who am I kidding, I'll post all of them that aren't gonna get me sued.
Happy commenting!
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